Change of heart

20 Oct

I know it’s been a while since my last post.  Ma b.

But, I’ve making some good progress on the journey from drawstrings to g-strings.  I’m down almost 7 pounds in Weight Watchers!  Maybe more since this started?  I didn’t weigh at the blog beginning.  But, anyway, Yay!  In the scheme of where I want to be, that’s very minimal.  But, It’s built the foundation.

What I’ve learned so far is that for me, I realize this is a journey and a lifestyle adjustment.  Therefore, I’m ok if it takes a while, but I can make real, sustainable, improvements.

I was talking to our friend, Nursifer, about this.  Nursifer has had her own ups and downs with weight.  She lost a bunch of weight back when were in Middle School, but maaaaaaaaaybe didn’t do it in a healthy way.  So, she had to spend some good time in college figuring out how to be healthy about weight loss.  But, she’s healthy now 🙂

Anyway, we agreed that no matter what, time will pass, so if we can gradually be losing weight, that’s awesome.  This summer will come soon enough.  No matter my job or my relationship status, or whatever life gives me, I have the opportunity each day to choose to be healthy and happy, or not.

So I still hold by the fake it til you make it in some arenas, I think I now have embraced the idea of carpe diem. Seize the day.  Make each day great, and better than the one before.

as jack kelly would say, seize the day!!

Somedays I eat like crap, don’t exercise, drink too much, lay around my house, engage in inappropriate relations, whatever.  I’m ok with that.  I want my life to have some missteps 🙂  That’s what’s fun about the ride.  But, rather than faking the progress, I am going to try to embrace my choices and always try to keep the eye on the prize.  That way, I can enjoy the indulgences but not get swept up in them.





8 Oct

One of the adjectives that I openly accept about myself is that I can be a little creepy.  I mean this in a benign, harmless way.  I just like to think that I’m curious, inquisitve and engaged.  I remember people from high school that don’t remember me.  I have I think somewhere in the range of 1,400 facebook friends.  Whatever.

Anyway, I am also a big Twins fan (even though our boys aren’t looking good against the evil pinstripes).  Apparantly, every year the Twins rookies dress up in costumes, at the end of the season.  It’s kind of a hazing rookie thing.  Seems kind of funny to me.  I know my fair share of baseball players, and overall, I would say that baseball players are a fun bunch.  They’re my top pick (though who can resist a soccer player’s body?!?!?!).  SO, being the engaged, inquisitive, curious person I am, I’m friends with the squirrely side-armer, Pat Neshek.  On his blog, he had a pic of the rookies dressed up.

Most are more beautiful than I would have thought.  I knew Butera was out.  But Trevor Plouffe?  Maybe he should get some more innings so I can see him.  But hands down, Danny Valencia fills out that Borat suit well, even with the censor (damn you, Neshek).

So, if you hear of a Vanessa Valencia in the news, just be happy that I’m out, continuing to live the dream.  If you’re lucky, I’ll post the honeymoon pics, and I’ll exclude the censor block.



my husband - Danny Valencia, Alex Burnett, Drew Butera, Jeff Manship, Ben Revere, Trevor Plouffe

alllll byyyy myselffffff

6 Oct

those canadian pipes belt out dreams.

I really hope when you read this blog post title you sang it in your head like Celine Dion. I know I did. I moved into a new apartment this weekend, which is awesome. And, you guessed it, I’m living all by myself. I could not be MORE excited about this. The one thing that does worry me is my tendency to get bad food and eat it. My downfall comes when I go to the grocery store after work and I’m just starving and have no willpower to say no to things. So, I got some nice advice to help with this: go to the grocery store more often so I can get a little piece of fish or some chicken to cook the next day, and never go to the grocery store hungry. Good point. So, instead of heading there right after work, I should go home and go for a walk or run, have my dinner THEN head to the store for the next day or 2. It’s also an activity to do post-dinner instead of vegging out. Sounds great doesn’t it? We’ll see how I do.

In the meantime, I think I’ll load up my iPod with Celine Dion and run away my weight loss blues to her tranquil Canadian melodies.




23 Sep

Last week, at my first WW meeting, our leader talked about staying positive through the weight loss journey.

She had a little chart equating weight loss to butter.  I can’t remember it, but I’ll give a rough estimate.  I liked it 🙂

If you lose .2 pounds (which I wouldn’t have even really counted as significant), that’s almost a whole stick of butter.  Think about taking a stick of butter off of your gut.  That’s kind of cool. 

If you lose .5 pounds, that’s 2 sticks of butter.

If you lose 1 pound, that’s 4 sticks of butter. 

So I mean, the little things add up, both good and bad.  I’m excited to see how much butter I’ve melted off (or maybe slapped on) of my bod.



how many sticks of butter equal an ass?


22 Sep

Expenses. I lose sleep worrying about them. Why does everything have to cost so much? And to that fact, why do I selfishly crave/need/want have so much stuff?? All this made me re-evaluate my finances since I’m moving into a new apartment in a week and a 1/2. When looking at my checking card/credit card statements (which I normally don’t do because I’m frightened to see what I spend money on) I realized that my spending habits directly relate to my weight- at least I think so. Let me explain.

oh booze...what you do to my wallet.

This past month a majority of my discretionary funds were spent on none other than BOOZE. Sad, but true. Such and such amount at this bar, such and such amount at that liquor store…and granted I’ve had my birthday party and some other parties where I needed to bring booze of some sort (I mean, it’s the best hostess gift you could ever get), but seriously self? I don’t need to spend a majority of my funds on you. Another culprit on the list is FOOD. I mean, WHY do I have to eat out so much? It’s not that I have to, but more that I want to, which I need to get under control. If all I do is drink and eat bad food, what else is left?

So after dissecting my spending habits, I realize that I need to re-prioritize my life. Make exercise a top habit (and I mean, I love being outdoors in the fall!) and do things that maybe do not require booze all the time. I can go out with my friends on a walk, rather than caloric happy hours. Go to a cool art gallery or free music show rather than pay $100 for Lady GaGa (who I’m dying to see, BTW). And I mean, I can just take some shots then head to the bar, right? I don’t have to buy shots or beers for people! I’ll just be less friendly in my “I want you to get to my drunken level so here’s a shot” way, and more friendly in my drunken self way.

Long story short, this journey is not solely about weight loss, but examining the person I am and making strides to accept the parts that are truly me and change the things that I don’t like- such as eating habits and spending habits. Life is so much more than this-  I want to just enjoy my friends and hobbies and not be hung up on this bullshit. So, I’ll keep plugging away, stay positive, and maybe get some ass?



The latest list

21 Sep

Last week, I had my first Weight Watchers meeting.  A ditched me, that piece of shit.  JK.  I had ditched her.  But now we’ve both gone to our first meeting and are ready to dive in.  I’m excited for the journey and look forward to blogging about it.

However, being the suck-up student I was, I feel it’s more important to work on my first (and only) assignment from the meeting, before I start spilling my feelings about it.

So, after the first meeting, the lovely leader, who had lost over 150 lbs on WW and kept it off for like 10 years, met with me.  She asked me why I was there and joining WW.  She then encouraged me to make a list of 25 reasons why I want to be there.  Most of the lists A and I make are of how many people we’ve boned, how many states we’ve boom-boomed in, you know, classy shit like that.  But, this is the meat and potatoes of the drawstrings to g-strings journey, so here goes:

1. I want to be skinnier than I am now, but I’m not unhappy or really unhealthy.  But, I DO NOT want to get any bigger.  So, I’m here to figure out a healthy lifestyle that I can carry with me.  Maybe that can count for 2 things.  We’ll see how this goes.

2. I never want to be obese.  Obese is an ugly word.  I’m technically not obese, but I am overweight.  Let’s make sure I NEVER get there.

3. I want my hot future husband to not have to settle for a non-hottie.

4. I want to confidently wear a bikini.

5. I want to be the hot friend, not just the fun or funny or nice friend.  I love being that friend, but I’m ok with throwing the hot one in there too 😉

6. I don’t want to turn to food when I’m stressed or sad.

7. Or on that note, to celebrate or reward myself.  I would like food to be something I enjoy, but doesn’t need to stress me out.

8. I want to run around the lakes in little spandex shorts or just a sports bra.

9. I want to be a yoga instructor as a side job, when I’m a teacher.

10. I don’t want my appearance or my weight to be my crutch as to what is “holding me back”

11. I want to wear clothes sizes that are only one digit.

12. I want to be proud of who I am.

13. I want to always love myself.

14. I want to turn heads when I walk into a room.

15. I want to run a half marathon under two hours.

16. I want to live an active lifestyle.

17. I never want to be out of breath after walking up stairs.

18. I don’t want a muffin top.

19. I want to wear low rise jeans.

20. I want to be able to sit on a man’s lap and not feel self-conscious.

21. I want to overcome an obstacle that I’ve faced my entire life.

22. I want to inspire a healthy lifestyle in those around me.

23. I want to have a focus and a reason for my actions (eating and exercising).

24. I want to make sure the world sees me as I see me.

25. I want to be the kick-ass sexy bitch I know I am.




21 Sep

i saw a beautiful, beautiful thing today. i was NOT motivated to go running and instead decided to go through more stuff for my big move coming up. i really REALLY regret it and don’t think i’ll skip running again any time soon. but to inspire me just that much more, i saw this video.

wow. talk about amazing. i want to make this video in a year!! to be inspired and just keep running until i love it and can’t go a day without it. already i’m feeling the connection and slight addiction to it which is great, but i want to run longer and harder and faster….i want to run this half marathon and be inspired to keep running, do another, and do better!!! so, keep your hopes up and just know that every little workout is helping you be HAPPY and get in shape (and feel good naked).